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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27688547">Out Like A Light</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account'>orphan_account</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>freeman's mind</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Character Death, I'll make a happier one later, M/M, Major Character Injury, RIP Freemind, based on episode 10.5, he forgot to wipe chip dust off his hands and slipped off the elevator shaft ladder, rated mature just in case, this was only going to be kinda sad but then Out Like A Light came on and this happened, toonbly I'm sorry i didn't know i was gonna hurt the bastard man this bad</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-07 02:08:25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>493</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27688547</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>"The shitty part is that I love you.</p><p>The even shittier part is that I've been in love with you for so long that I forgot what not loving you is like."</p><p> </p><p>AKA: Freemind doesn't have much time left.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Gordon Freeman/Eddie (FM)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>29</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Out Like A Light</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The shitty part is that I love you.</p><p>The even shittier part is that I've been in love with you for so long that I forgot what not loving you is like.</p><p>It fucking sucks because all I can think about is your eyes and your smile sometimes. All I can think about is the way you dance with me when we have a heavy buzz going. All I can think about is the fact that you look at me in a way that no one ever has before and it hurts.</p><p>Everything really fucking hurts right now.</p><p>But, shit, even right now I can't stop thinking about you. I never know when to stop, when to quit. Shit, that's why I'm here right now. Goddamn it, I'm crying just thinking about you. You're probably still in my apartment right now, since I know how much you hate leaving when I'm not there to say goodbye.</p><p>I didn't wanna get up today. You were holding onto me and I had my arms around you. We still share a bed, I keep making excuses about how shitty my couch is to sleep on so I can wake up next to you in the morning. God, you're fucking pretty when you sleep. You look so peaceful and I wanna kiss you. I wanna kiss you so bad it makes me look fucking stupid but instead I just try to ignore it because who would love me? No one would want me and honestly I can't blame them. I know I don't deserve you but when you're holding on to me in the middle of the night I start to feel like someone finally really wants me.</p><p>I start to think that you might want me.</p><p>Nah, you probably don't. You probably have a thing for a girl in a different state we passed through while running from the cops. You probably don't even know that I love you, you probably never will.</p><p>And that's where we get to the shittiest part.</p><p>I'm gonna die here.</p><p>Fucking elevator shaft. Fucking Black Mesa. Fucking face-hugger crab bullshit. Fucking Resonance Cascade. I probably wouldn't care if I never met you. I probably would've been fine dying down here. But, shit, you just had to come and fuck that all up with your pretty face and soft hair and your tall, dumb-ass smacking your face on the doorway of my hellhole apartment on purpose when you were piss drunk, the first night we slept in the same bed.</p><p>[H.E.V. ACTIVATED</p><p>AUTOMATIC MEDICAL SYSTEMS ENGAGE.]</p><p>Shit, I still have so much to say to you.</p><p>[MAJOR FRACTURE DETECTED.]</p><p>I still have so much I wanna fucking do! I can't die now! I need to-</p><p>[INTERNAL BLEEDING DETECTED.]</p><p>Goddamn it... It's getting hazy. Shit, I'm tired...</p><p>[EMERGENCY: USER DEATH IMMINENT.]</p><p>Eddie... I love you... I love you... I...</p><p>[EMERGENCY: USER DEATH IMMINENT.]</p><p>[EMERGENCY: USER DEATH IMMINENT.]</p><p>[EMERGENCY: USER DEATH-]</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Yeehaw, gamers! I think this might be the first Freecrime fic on ao3 and I'm sorry it isn't that good lmao (title and fic based off the song "Out Like A Light" by The Honeysticks)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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